Inspiration from this Episode

“It is a grief no one is anticipating. In the pregnancy process, we are anticipating life, not death.”

“It is really impacted in some ways by what our hopes and dreams and our plans were.”

“If you need to, be your own advocate. If you need another opinion, get another opinion.”

058 | Us & Kids: Pregnancy and Loss

Intro  

On today’s show, we are talking about how to stay married forever and parent together even when you have experienced a miscarriage or early infant loss. It can be hard to keep a marriage together under such great emotional strain.

I interviewed Nancy Kingma, MA, LLP. She is an expert in my area who has worked in pregnancy loss and infant loss for over 40 years. We talk through the experiences no one ever wants to have happen so I asked a variety of questions and I will share today some of her responses.

What You’ll Learn in Today’s Episode

• The...

Inspiration from this Episode

“All of these things take emotions - and our kids are learning how to do things - physically and emotionally by watching us.”

“So, to become more calm, more quickly, we might practice using courage in the face of fears.”

“Just like muscles, the more emotions you have working well within you, the stronger, more confident, gracious and loving you can be.”

057 | Us & Kids: Muscles and Emotions

Intro 

On today’s show, we are going to talk one more time about emotions - in comparison to our muscles. We’ve been talking a lot about emotions - and EQ - that emotional intelligence. You’ve probably noticed that we have a variety of muscles and rely on them everyday. 

We also want you to have a good variety of emotions that you use everyday. So, make a short list of the emotions that you experience each day for a week and see what you notice. Be sure to use the printable or the...

Inspiration from this Episode

“Marriage is not a set it and forget it kind of endeavour.”

“Our very first question is around the marriage mindset. What do you think about marriage? What do you hope will do for you? What do you expect to get out of marriage? Why are you marrying the other person?

“A lot of times people get married thinking they are going to fix or change the other person, and they are often sorely disappointed.”

056 | Us & Kids: EQ, Marriage and Kids

Intro 

On today’s show, we have my friend and fellow marriage professional Mark VanDellen, who is going to talk to us about the six things we need for getting our marriage started well and keeping it running smoothly.

Mark works a lot with pre-marriages and new marriages and helping them get off on the right foot. He shares with us the key indicators that he looks for and identifies when looking at the path for future marriages.

What You’ll Learn in...

Inspiration from this Episode

“It’s not having emotions that’s the problem, it’s how we manage those emotions.”

“Move away from those seven big emotions, and move towards something more specific.”

“As a spouse it is part of your duty to just sit and listen, but that comes with the territory. Just sit and listen to somebody share their emotion.”

055 | Us & Kids: EQ and You - How to Become More Emotionally Smart

Intro 

On today’s show, we have my good friend and fellow marriage professional Mark VanDellen joining us. He knows all about emotional intelligence and we are going to talk all about how to become more emotionally smart.

This impacts our marriages and parenting in such wonderful ways when we use it well. Join Mark and myself for a great interview, conversation about emotional intelligence and how it interacts with both our marriages and our kiddos.

What You’ll Learn in...

Inspiration from this Episode

“By saying you have nothing to say, you are saying a lot.” 

“What can you say? Other than being filled with just joy and awe.”

“In those moments, take a minute to just let your heart beam right out of your body and out of your face.”

054 | Us & Kids: Speechlessness - I Have Nothing to Say

Intro 

For today’s show, things felt a little different in the fact that I felt like I had nothing to say. But once I dove into the “I have nothing to say”, my brain dove into the feeling that I have all sorts of things to say.

Ever been speechless? Stunned...or shamed into silence? So tired you can not make a sentence? Or over thinking something without a clear thought or direction at all? What creates those moments? What should we do with them? How do we find words or expressions that actually free us up without creating another big fuss?

What You’ll Learn in Today’s...

Inspiration from this Episode 

“You are the best buffer in terms of absorbing stress so that they can continue to develop the best way that they can.”

“We forget that we can quickly and easily overstimulate them.”

“Lower your voice, lower the speed of the interactions."

053 | Us & Kids: Parenting Refresher

Intro  

On today’s show, we are going to talk about our kiddos and come at it from the angle of parenting. We have to make sure we understand what is happening as our kiddos make this adjustment into school.

The kids might be a few weeks into school and this might be a time where things start to crumble. So I am here to give you a bit of encouragement that you can pass on to them. We talked a little bit about this in previous episodes and now we are going to do a little refresher.

What You’ll Learn in Today’s Episode

• Kids react how they know how.
• How to absorb the stress for the kids.
• ...

Inspiration from this Episode

“If it doesn’t fit together well, the relationship doesn’t work as well.”

“This represents a relationship where we are clicking together even though we don’t have to be exactly matched up at the moment.”

“We want you to be able to comfort each other compassionately, wisely, with encouragement.”

052 | Us & Kids: Keys To Your Car & Relationships

Intro 

On today’s show, we are taking a little more lighthearted approach and we’re talking about keys. More specifically talking about car keys but we will start out with just keys in general. We use keys for things like our home, car, maybe a bike lock, but what do they have to do with a relationship anyways?

A key by itself without a lock or something to go into, is not usually of much value. We find loose keys around the house and they eventually get thrown because they are for something we don’t have or use...

How to keep the back-to-school-crazy out of the kids and you!

Inspiration from this Episode

“Your kindness in this is really important to them feeling confident.”

“You’re the person who is going to absorb some of this fear and trade that fear in for them with some calmness and some courage.”

“It’s their brains' way of figuring it out and getting rid of the fear that doesn’t have words.”

051 | Us & Kids: Back to School

Intro 

On today’s show, we are talking about the big topic of going back to school. I know going back to school for our kids right now and for us parents just feels daunting and weird. I'm sure by now you have looked through what your schools are offering and what the choices are for online versus in person.

Remember that the best thing you can do for your kiddo, no matter where they're going, is to be supportive of them. You are the best buffer for them against the stress they are...

Inspiration from this Episode 

“Living it is so much more different than reading about it or hearing other people’s experiences.”

“Your voice is calming, your voice is sweet and intriguing. They pick that up.”

“They're developing their personality and as they grow their little beliefs about themselves and about how they should live life.”

050 | Us & Kids: Top 5 Podcasts in Review

Intro 

On today’s show, we’re going to do something a little bit different. We have gone through all of our podcast episodes and picked the top 5. In the beginning of this podcast we talked about the first 5 years of married life and then progressed into the first 5 years after having kiddos. The theme seems to be the number 5 so we chose our 5 favorites to review. 

It’s been almost a year since Us and Kids became real. And part of our growth and joy has been in putting together a podcast with a printable each...

Here

Inspiration from this Episode

“This can happen by the stacking up of one small fear after another, and feeling intimidated over and over again.” 

“So, help your child get this storyline right and understand that even when they don't get what they want, they still are valued, and important to you into the household.”

“You have gained understanding about your kiddo’s thoughts and worries - acknowledging that this is hard, scary, and weird.”

049 | Us & Kids: Regression & Stress with Kids

Intro 

On today’s show, we are talking all about regression and stress. These can be really scary and overwhelming words. Knowing the why, the where and the what-to-do can really help settle down the worry that comes with regressing.

Regression is usually when someone or something goes back(wards) to something that used to be. A kiddo might regress to fighting bedtime, or bathroom use, or baby talk. We usually regress...